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Friday, March 19, 2004

“If you had brains you’d be dangerous.”
Words spoken by my father over the years. To me, to others.
To say I do not understand this proclamation is an understatement. I do not understand its meaning. I’ve tried and come up with nothing. It may refer to common sense or a lack thereof. We all make errors in judgment. Lately it's been...

Simple things such as buying Kool-aid and actually mixing it. Worse still, drinking it. Ick.
Bigger things such as bidding on a lap top computer although unemployed…and winning. Shit.
Or impulsively flipping off the light of the room in which my one-year old nephew is standing and immediately hearing him knock into the dresser. Oops.
Wasn’t he supposed to freeze where he was and scream or laugh or something?
God, I love that kid. He’s not talking yet, but yesterday he brought one or more of his shoes to me and said very distinctly, “Shzzz.” And I put them on him and we went outdoors and he mowed the lawn with his little plastic mower and I photographed the sun dancing in his blonde curly hair and watched the sky reflecting in his eyes.
He would stop periodically to dance to the sounds of a passing car stereo or wave at power-walkers. He is young and happy and for now has no understanding of the strange and confused aunt that loves him more than anything.


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