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Monday, March 01, 2004

NOT (necessarily) CONVERSATIONS I'VE HAD RECENTLY

At Whole Foods
"How much is this vanilla bean, please?"
"They are two-hundred, ninety-nine dollars a pound."
"I don't need a pound...just the one vanilla bean, please."
"Okay. I'll need a minute to work out the math on that."
"Indeed."

With my Mother
"You know Mom, you are always complaining that I never call yet in every instance, you have let me go first and with the excuse you need to go to the bathroom. It's the same with Dad."

"Let me let you go, I need to run to the bathroom."

"By all means...do that."


With my Brother
"So what has the most wonderful and adorable little one-year-old in the world been up to?"

"His french fries blew off the bleachers the other night and he then went around begging all of the mothers for more."

"What? No he didn't. He can't even talk."

"He did. A dog can not talk yet he begs."

"Are you comparing my nephew to a dog?"

"Are you accusing me of comparing my son to a dog?"

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