Friday, May 14, 2004

I was going to make an entry Wednesday, but I couldn't.

First my body became weak and then I began to shake all over.
And the shaking continued. My heart was racing. I couldn't breath or calm myself.

I had witnessed the most disturbing and horrifying thing I had, or will ever, see.
I was hysterical, but didn't realize to what extent. I was slowly losing it and had no one to blame but myself.
I tried calling the only person that I could talk to. The only person who wouldn't judge me or scold me for doing something so idiotic. It didn't help. I had tortured myself. I had shocked my brain.

I refused to understand that just because you have the means, in this case the Internet, does NOT MEAN you should use it. At times curiosity is a thing to suppress, not to satisfy.
I went too far.
There are things that are not meant for us to see. There are things not meant for ME to see.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words.
But a video.............................................................

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