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Monday, January 03, 2005

I walked to the bank today. It was kind of far. If you are from Houston you may read about it in some zine later this month.

I guess "I got my exercise for the day". I hate it when people say that. What that really means is, they got their exercise for the week or month. People who say that almost never exercise on a daily basis.

I have no room to talk, though. The most exercise I get sometimes is climbing into the beer cooler to take a self-portrait.




Just thinking of exercising makes me tired. I think I'm going to go lie down now.

Oh, a piece of advice. If you take your dog outside to do his business and he wanders into the street, you should squat down and call to him nicely so that he will get out of the street and not be scared that you are going to beat him to death if he comes to you. And maybe if cars begin to stack up you should even drop your cigarette on the driveway so after your dog is out of harm's way you could just pick it up and resume smoking it.

Or...you could stand on the curb and scream his name like some crazy person before grabbing him by the collar and dragging him across the lawn while still holding your cigarette like Brigitte Bardot or something. Especially if you are my downstairs neighbor.


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